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The Psychology Of Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, and with it may come an array of emotional responses. For some, this could mean powerful feelings of love and romance. While others may feel alone or even apathy for the day itself. Valentine’s Day is one of the few nationally recognized holidays that can be quite polarizing in people’s perception of it. If your initial reaction to Valentine’s Day is dread or anxiety, as your South Bay therapist, it is my hope to promote a healthier perspective about this sometimes triggering holiday. The 14th of February does not need to be anticipated with dread. I want to ensure that you spend this year’s holiday exactly how you want to, and even more importantly, feeling good about yourself.

Valentine’s Day began with Saint Valentine secretly arranging and marrying couples in Rome during the third century. Since then, the holiday has grown immensely to be a day for lovers to celebrate their romance. In the US, it has also grown to be a money making commodity, which is estimated to make $18.6 billion this year. Unfortunately, the media has portrayed the holiday in romanticized and idealized ways and has managed to put pressure on all of us to be in a relationship or want a relationship. However, just because it is a popular holiday among some people, that doesn’t mean it has to be a meaningful holiday to you. You get to decide how important you want it to be!

For all of my clients, I believe Valentine’s Day should be a positive experience, whether you are single or in a relationship. At its core, the day is a representation of the love and the happiness we feel about other people. I want you to share your time and your happiness with the ones you love around you. This does not necessarily mean in a romantic way. The day can be spent with friends or family, freeing you from the pressure to be in a relationship or from feelings of loneliness if you are not in a relationship. I recommend picking something fun to do on the 14th of February – which may or may not have anything to with an intimate relationship. Choose to do something new or plan an afternoon or evening full of self care. This will give you something to look forward to and reinforce the reality that the day does not have to be centered around the romantic idea of Valentine’s Day. The day gets to be whatever you want it to be because whatever you decide to do can be done by yourself, with a friend, or with a significant other!

If you are worried or feeling anxious about Valentine’s Day, let’s sit down and talk about it. As always, feel free to call your South Bay therapist for concerns or email me to set up your next consultation. Together, we can make this Valentine’s Day your best Valentine’s Day. Call my Hermosa Beach office today!